Thursday, January 18, 2007

Ponderings for 2007

Thanks to a "Slightly Crunchy Attachment Parenting" Yahoo Group member for sending this!


#10 Life is sexually transmitted.

#9 Good health is merely the slowest rate at which one can die

#8 Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.

#7 Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.

#6 Some people are like a slinky... not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.

#5 Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in the hospital dyingof nothing

#4 All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.

#3 Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars, and a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents???

#2 In the 60's, people took LSD to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

AND THE NUMBER ONE THOUGHT FOR 2007: We know exactly where one cow with mad-cow disease is located among the millions and millions of cows inAmerica, and where one strain of e-coli got into the spinach, but we haven't a clue as to how to apprehend thousands of known criminals,including serial killers, pedophiles, Internet predators, identity thieves, would-be and actual terrorists, foreign students whose visas have expired, illegal aliens, suspect members of Congress, crooked CEO's and CFO's etc. Maybe we should just put the Department ofAgriculture in charge of everything.

1 comment:

Cindy G said...

***Snort coffe through nose** I need to go make someone a sandwich.